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Random thoughts from the ether, otherwise known as: When in doubt, mention Jon Hamm.

Hello from the aforementioned ether. In this case, the ether is looking a lot like ill-fitting maternity pants, a kindergartner about to go on her first field trip ever (MYBABY), and a continuing small business that has me making up extra-lurid swear word combinations during school hours (which are getting shorter, you mark my words and say what you will about the laws of time and space and, uh, maybe physics).

home volcano kit

And when you tell them you'll miss them when they're on their field trip, they just go on trying to erupt the kitchen.

1. You all are a creative group. Thank you for all the baby name suggestions. I must say, this sticking-with-four-letters theme is trickier than it first appears. Especially because I’m not married to the idea. My three top name choices are all at least six letters long. They suffer in other ways, too, including that TWO freakin’ celebrities just used a name each. That leaves me with my last choice, which I love because it harkens to the beauty of Arthurian legend. Of course, when I say things like harkens to the beauty of Arthurian legend, Adam just snorts and drinks more, which is completely unfair since my Twentieth-Century-Female-Figures-of-Literary-Infamy name choices (THERE IS NOTHING WRONG WITH WILLA OR ZELDA) were shot down the first time around. And this is basically why we have to overthrow a paternalistic society, in case that wasn’t clear.

Photo of Willa Cather, courtesy Nebraska State Historical Society

Willa, Willa. How you made me love you. Oh, and hate Nebraska.

2. Speaking of celebrities, we watched the forever-awaited season premiere of Mad Men last night. I mention this because–as if this is not already abundantly clear–I have very little else of import going on in my life and I would probably sell at least one fully delivered child and one still-baking child (now a temptingly barter-able eight-and-a-half inches long) for some quality time with Jon Hamm. That being said, I was a little let down. Maybe it was the lack of Betty, maybe it was my ambivalence about New Wife Megan, or maybe it’s because I realized just as it was about to start that there wasn’t a single Cadbury Mini Egg in the house and suddenly colors didn’t seem as bright.

(But was it just me? Anyone else finish the episode with a so-so feeling?)

3. My final ramble, directed to those of you inclined to let your kindergartner tackle her What I Did This Weekend homework on her own: DON’T.

kindergarten art gone awry

For if you should let her do it on her own, she will draw a stick figure secured by multiple ropes to a variety of sturdy structures with the explanation “I WENT TO LEAH’S TO TIE HER MOM.” And somehow your hasty explanation to the teacher that Aura and her friend played a knot-tying game with the friend’s mom won’t make up for the fact that yes, your child is looking a lot like a home invader in the making.

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