Oh, how time passes. Was it only a month ago that I said I was going to write a post on our First Family Trip to New York City? I apparently have come to my senses sometime between then and now, since nothing is more brain-numbingly boring that someone else’s account of her vacation. Except maybe a photo slide show. That’s what they used instead of water torture at Guantanamo. Seriously. My sources are solid.
Anyway, the only part of the NYC trip that anyone else might find remotely enchanting is this:
Okay, so maybe not that. But this:
Yep. Aura and Adam played a rousing game of Whack-a-Mole next to Chris Rock and his kids. While Adam did have a ten-second conversation with him about why the line for tickets was moving so slowly (computer down! so exciting!), neither of us acknowledged who he was, because that would be creepy and weird, even though both of us could recite the entirety of his HBO specials.
But then this guy walks up to Chris Rock, right smack in the middle of his little girl bearing down on a particularly frisky mole, and starts quoting one of his bits back to him. Though Mr. Rock was gracious, it was truly horrifying. Much like a photo slide show, in fact, but ten times more humiliating. Like a naked slide show.
ANYWAY. This leads me to ask: Which celebrity would I ever care about enough to approach? Sure, I’ve enjoyed John Irving’s novels for many years, so I guess I could quote a line or two from A Prayer for Owen Meany or something if I found myself in line behind him at the grocery store.
But that just smacks of literary wannabeishness. I think it’s a lot more likely that I’ll simply spot Bruce Willis in Target someday and choose to yell “Yippee ki-ay, MOTHERFUCKER!” at the top of my lungs. Granted, it’ll be an expensive moment of spontaneity. First there will be the whole arrest-and-paying-bail thing. And then you have the cost of enrolling Aura in some kind of retroactive deafness therapy. Eh, hardly worth it.
Thank God I live in eastern Massachusetts. The biggest threat around here is bumping into John Malkovich while moseying around Cambridge. And I’ve seen In the Line of Fire enough times to know you shouldn’t go near that one.
(So, come on. Who would you choose to approach? Because someone out there has to love imagining self-humiliation as much as I do. Action movies, too.)
That picture is so cool! I NEVER want to approach celebrities. My husband ALWAYS does. For that, I think he is totally lame. But he has had conversations with Angelina Jolie, Heidi Klum, and others. So he does have some stories to pass on to Peanut
I saw an interview with Matthew who said that despite all his roles on Broadway and everything else he’s done since that not one single day has gone by since the film’s release however many years ago that someone hasn’t shouted
out “save Ferris” to him! I liked that he restrained from saying “some idiot” though his tone implied it. In my prebaby days I spent five years working as a publicist for two move studios and by fat the craziest experience I ever had was working the premiere of the first of the new Stat Wars
movies. There is an entire subspeicie that truly, truly believes that George Lucas is the once and future king. By the way, I didn’t mean to imply that I’m on a first name basis with Matthew Broderick- it’s just that I spaced on his last name any stupid iPhone won’t let me scroll up to add it in!!!
My brushes-with-celebrity were more frequent when I lived in Los Angeles (well, duh). My favorite story: future-hubby and I were in a sub shop and a petite blond woman walked in.FH leaned over to me and whispered just a little too loudly, “Honey! That woman looks JUST LIKE Candace Bergen!” To which I replied, “That’s because it IS Candace Bergen.”
We were rewarded with a scathing look. We deserved it.
That’s an easy one. Mark Wahlberg, Ben Affleck and Matthew McCounaughey. I would simply ask their recipe for success. How can one be so bad at something yet make so much money? I’m truly amazed.
The Christmas Tree Umbrella, circa 1982, The Dame School. Gary Fowke as Papa Umberto. To this day I’m still approached and ask about the performance. It kind of goes with the territory.
PL & L
Oh man, that is so cool that you saw him. And, yes, horrifying that the numbskull approached him. I don’t know if I’d have the balls to approach anyone. Probably not. No celebrity has affected my life so much that I need to personally tell them about it. But it’d be cool to get the photo. Nice angle, by the way…
Ooooh, I love Chris Rock.
You really want to know about which celebrities I’d approach? Really? Like really, really?
hmm…well i met the ghost hunters, but i did not talk to them about their show. we talked about their inn. because that’s where we were. some wild and crazy stuff, huh?
i’d approach the surferwife. she is basically a celeb. and i would ask for her autograph.
And now I want to play whack-a-mole…;)