One summer day, Mother and Daughter went for an impromptu swimming lesson at a family member’s pool. Afterward, flushed from the exercise and some yelling (AURA, YOU NEED TO LET GO OF ME! THE SWIM BUBBLE WILL HELP YOU FLOAT! IF YOU GRASP THE FRONT OF MY BATHING SUIT AND EXPOSE MY BREASTS ONE MORE [...]
Apparently, the planets have aligned, the stars have crossed, and a ritual sacrifice of a Polly Pocket or two (RELAX, one of them was already missing her left arm and the other one bore an off-putting resemblance to Mickey Rourke) has been made, for we have a babysitter. This is a rare occurrence, so rare [...]
As summer sets in, Aura and I are enjoying a rather fancy-free season. Freed from the September–June preschool, etc. schedule, we’ve been sort of meandering, hitting a beach here, an amusement park there, an ice-cream shop or twenty over there. Since it is widely known that I’m allergic to overscheduling (seriously, there are hives involved; [...]
Guess what? A month and a half ahead of time, I have already researched, chosen, and purchased my own birthday present. On August 3, I will turn 33, an age I have decided to be excited about because it involves a double digit and therefore bodes of Good Things, much like a four-leaf clover or [...]
So! I came down with a slight cold this week! And guess what I suddenly remembered! !!! SUDAFED IS THE GREATEST CREATION EVER! Seriously, you guys. Have you had a Sudafed lately? The real stuff, with the actual pseudoephedrine? The thing is like a miracle drug. My appetite, normally a raging monster that can sense [...]
THE TOP TWO WAYS I KNOW I’M NOT A GIRLY ENOUGH GIRL #1: Facial Hatred Sometime last month, I scheduled a long overdue facial, determined to finally use the spa gift card I had received two Christmases earlier. As I was leaving for the appointment, Adam innocently said, “Have fun!” “LIKE THAT’S GOING TO HAPPEN!” I hissed, giving [...]
I admit: I haven’t been the brightest ray of sunshine around the old homestead as of late. There are probably all kinds of small and inconsequential reasons for this, although I think much of my mood stems from the fact that Aura has been battling one small illness after another these past two months. She [...]
Because, you know, buying a deep-fat fryer and using Twitter are both things I swore up and down and upon several different peoples’ lives I would never do. But here I am, with a real Twitter username and background and everything. I am so bitterly disappointed in myself that I would be tempted to do [...]
Look! It’s my new phone! Yes, I know. It’s not like I needed a smartphone. Being a SAHM and a part-time freelance writer doesn’t exactly merit the purchase. But I’ve been drooling after Adam’s Droid for months now, and when my old phone starting turning itself off at inopportune times, I decided to go for [...]
